Out Of My Mind
by Holly Gilmore
Summary: Was I out of my head? Was I out of my mind? How could I have ever been so blind? -- Two Best Friends. One Beautiful Girl. -- Complete --
1. Going Through The Motions

A/N: This is an AU fic I guess. It's set... around late 2002. Rory and Dean have never been a couple. Rory and Jess have never been a couple but are good friends and sometimes there's a little harmless flirting going on there. hehe. The main difference in this fic is..... Jess and Dean are *gasp* Good Friends!

** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!**

_The hip bone's connected to the…thigh bone and the thigh bone's connected to the… to the…_  
  
"Luke, what's the thigh bone connected to?" Lorelai frowned.  
  
"The knee bone." He sighed filling up a customers coffee cup. "Why?"  
  
"No reason." She smiled, sipping her own cup of coffee.  
  
_ The thigh bone's connected to the…knee bone and the knee bone's connected to the…_  
  
"Damnit." She sighed.  
  
"What now?" He asked, throwing a dishtowel over his shoulder and leaning on the chair opposite her.  
  
"Nothing. Dem Dry Bones." She muttered to herself.  
  
He frowned at her and shook his head slightly.  
  
"Sure, whatever you say. Can I get you something to eat or are you just going to sit there and mumble like an old drunk?" He asked.  
  
"Well, since you put it so nicely… the latter." She grinned.  
  
"Great." He sighed and walked away.  
  
Rory pushed open the door of the diner and shook the snow off of her feet.  
  
"Hey, you're late." Smiled Lorelai.  
  
"The bus had to go slower, 'cos of the snow." She said breathlessly, taking her scarf and coat off and sitting opposite Lorelai. "Gimme."  
  
"Hey!" Lorelai scrunched her face up into a playful pout as Rory grabbed her coffee cup.  
  
"I just want to hold it, my hands are frozen." She smiled. "Luke, can I have a cup of coffee." She called across the diner.  
  
"Sure. Or… I could get you some hot cocoa?" He offered, trying to find an alternative to coffee.  
  
"Thanks, but I'm in the mood for coffee."  
  
"Are you ever not?" He said, rolling his eyes.  
  
Lorelai and Rory grinned at each other.  
  
"Ok, I love you. You're beautiful… but give me my coffee back." Smiled Lorelai, reaching out for the cup.  
  
"But my hands…" Rory said, flashing her baby blues at Lorelai.  
  
"Hey, that doesn't work on me." Lorelai said, narrowing her eyes at Rory. "I got my own set, they repel the power of yours."  
  
Rory pouted a little and pushed the cup back over the table to Lorelai.  
  
"Hey, where are you going?" Luke called out.  
  
Lorelai and Rory both looked up to see Jess leaving the diner.  
  
"I'll be back later."  
  
"You're closing tonight!"  
  
Jess waved his hand once without turning around, indicating to Luke that he had heard the reminder.  
  
He stepped down on to the sidewalk and started to cross the street.  
  
"Jess!"  
  
He turned around and smiled slightly.  
  
"Hey."  
  
"You headin' to Gypsy's?" Asked Dean.  
  
"Yeah, you?"  
  
"I have to stop by Doose's first and pick up my paycheck." He sighed.  
  
"Sounds fun." Chuckled Jess sarcastically.  
  
"Yeah well, you're coming too, so you can wipe that smile off of your face."  
  
"I never said I was coming into the market." Said Jess, shoving his hands in his pockets.  
  
"It was implied by 'wanna get together after school and work on your bike?'" Dean pointed out.  
  
"I never imply." Jess smiled. "I say what I mean. If I didn't say I was coming into Doose's then I'm not coming into Doose's." He said, shaking his head.  
  
"He'll be too busy getting my pay check to say anything to you."  
  
"Not happening man." He laughed at Dean's persistence.  
  
"You're such an ass." Sighed Dean as they reached the market.  
  
"Keep it up bag boy, I never said I wouldn't cut the break lines on your bike by 'mistake'." Jess said raising an eyebrow at Dean.  
  
Dean rolled his eyes and laughed quietly as he entered the market.  
  


*****

  
  
Rory looked up at the sound of knocking on the door.  
  
"Mom." She called, returning to her homework.  
  
"You get it." Lorelai called back.  
  
"No… I'm busy." She shouted.  
  
"Me too."  
  
Rory looked towards the kitchen.  
  
"Mom, it's Microwave popcorn."  
  
"Yes, and it says on the bag that you have to stay and watch."  
  
Rory sighed and reluctantly got off of the couch. She straightened her tank top and pajama bottoms and plodded over to the door.  
  
Jess was leaning against the doorframe, holding a book out to her.  
  
"You're late." She smiled slightly and took it.  
  
"Oh. Well then, please accept my deepest apologies." He said mockingly.  
  
"We'll see. 'Atop An Underwood'?" She laughed softly.  
  
"Trust me."  
  
"Again? You think I'm some kind of idiot?"  
  
"You'd be doing yourself a disservice if you didn't read it."  
  
"Ok, alright. But if you're wrong…"  
  
"I'm not." He smiled and she nodded. "Nothing for me?" He asked.  
  
"Nope, I have to finish reading it tonight. I'll bring it to Luke's tomorrow."  
  
"You know what happens if you don't?" He smiled playfully.  
  
"I know, I know. I have to watch 'Glorious'." She sighed.  
  
"The guy is a genius." Jess insisted.  
  
"If you say so."  
  
"I do. I gotta go, I'm…"  
  
"Closing. I know." She nodded.  
  
"Remember the book." He said as he started to leave.  
  
"I will." She smiled and waved.  
  
Rory closed the door slowly and smiled, looking at the book he'd given her.  
  
"Who was that?" Asked Lorelai, carrying the popcorn into the living room.  
  
"Jess, dropping off a book." She said, following and taking a handful.  
  
"What book?" Lorelai frowned. "'Atop An Underworld'. What is that, like…. Buffy?"  
  
"It's 'Atop an Underwood'." Rory chuckled and put the book on the coffee table.  
  


*****

  
  
Dean sat in the Diner tapping his fork lightly on the table.  
  
"Hey."  
  
He looked up at Jess and sighed.  
  
"I said go away."  
  
"Way to look desperate." Laughed Jess, putting a cup off coffee in front of Dean.  
  
"Jess, she's going to be here any minute." Said Dean, anxiously looking around.  
  
"Yeah, I know. When we take her arrival times for the past week, add them together and divide by 5 we can presume that Rory Gilmore will be walking through that door at 4:32pm exactly." He teased.  
  
"Jess, I swear to god…" Started Dean.  
  
"Hey." They both looked over as Rory entered the diner. Jess looked at his watch.  
  
"4:32pm." He said quietly to Dean. "Damn I'm good!"  
  
"Get lost Jess." Dean said under his breath.  
  
"I'm going, I'm going." He laughed.  
  
"Hey Rory." Dean smiled, standing up.  
  
"Hey."  
  
"Uh… can I get you some coffee?" He asked, pulling a chair out for her.  
  
"Sure." She giggled, sitting down. "Thanks."  
  
"No problem." Dean looked over and Jess and nodded and Jess gave him a thumbs up. Rory didn't see.  
  
"Something… wrong?" She frowned, wriggling out of her coat and pulling her hat off.  
  
"No, no." He shook his head. "I'm fine. Are you, good… I mean… can I get you something?"  
  
"No." She laughed softly. "Dean, you're… acting weird."  
  
"I'm fine!" He nodded.  
  
"Ok." She frowned.  
  
"Here you go. One coffee. Can I get you something to eat?" Asked Jess.  
  
"Um… no. I'm good." Said Dean.  
  
"Same here." Rory nodded.  
  
"Are you're sure? 'Cos I made a club sandwich for myself the other day, and let me tell you…"  
  
"Jess…" Dean glared at him.  
  
"I didn't get to tell you about the mustard." Jess said, trying to keep a straight face.  
  
"I think we'll survive."  
  
"Ok then." Jess smiled and walked away.  
  
Dean looked back to Rory who had a puzzled expression on her face.  
  
"So, Rory…" He started nervously.  
  
"Dean…" She smiled slightly.  
  
"I was thinking… there's this film I heard about and…"  
  
"Rory! Oh my god, I've been looking for you all over… Well… ok, I haven't been looking…" Said Lorelai, closing the diner door behind her.  
  
Dean tried to hide his disappointment.  
  
"Oooh, coffee…" Lorelai grinned picking up Rory's cup.  
  
"Hey!"  
  
"Share, sweetie, share. Have I not taught you anything?!" Lorelai frowned.  
  
Rory sat openmouthed as Lorelai drank half of her coffee.  
  
"So, what are we talking about?" She smiled.  
  
"A movie…?" Said Rory uncertainly, looking at Dean.  
  
"Ooh, good. That reminds me, there was this movie I was reading about. There's this guy… and he has some kind of… disease and he can't really leave his home, and then one day this woman comes to his door and…"  
  
"Yeah, that's the one I was telling her about." Said Dean, forcing a smile.  
  
"Cool. So, I was thinking we'd go?" She asked Rory.  
  
"Yay, movie night." Grinned Rory. "Don't forget the red vines this time."  
  
"Brownies promise. Or was it Brownies honor?" Lorelai frowned. "Nope… it's scouts honor."  
  
"What does it matter, you were none of the above." Smiled Rory, finishing her coffee.  
  
"I know. The uniforms weren't my color." Pouted Lorelai. "Ready to go?"  
  
"You're leaving?" Dean asked.  
  
"Sorry." Rory sighed apologetically. "Thanks for the coffee though."  
  
"No problem." He said, giving her a faint smile as she stood up and picked up her coat.  
  
"Bye Dean." Lorelai said cheerfully as they left.  
  
When they were gone Dean let his shoulders sag and his face fall.  
  
"Aw, Man…" Jess came over and patted Dean on the shoulder.  
  
"Please don't start." Sighed Dean.  
  
"I didn't say anything." He said defensively. "But…" He whistled and shook his head. "That sucked."  
  
"Yeah, I was there. I noticed." Said Dean despondently.  
  
"But hey, there's always tomorrow?" Jess said supportively.  



	2. He's Not The Messiah, He's A Very Naught...

A/N: Ok.. someone asked me if this is going to be a 'slash'. I have no clue what it means. (Not ashamed to admit it since some Lit writers don't know what Literati is). But it sounds bad. Like a horror movie or something. lol. So no. I don't think this fic is 'slash'. And... I'm not telling if it's R/J or R/D. You'll find out soon.

** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!**

Luke looked up from serving a customer as Rory walked into the diner. He frowned at her sad expression and watched her take a seat at the counter.  
  
"Hey." He said, trying to hide the concern he was feeling.  
  
"Hey Luke." She sighed. "Can I get a burger, with cheese."  
  
"Yeah… what kind of cheese?" He asked.  
  
"Uh… Cheddar."  
  
"Coming right up." He nodded.  
  
"And American." She added.  
  
Luke stopped in his tracks and turned.  
  
"Cheddar and American?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"You know… the cheddar and beef will block an entire artery with out the help of the American cheese?" He said, raising an eyebrow at her.  
  
She looked at him and gave a small shrug.  
  
"Cheddar and American cheese it is." He sighed, shaking his head and walking into the kitchen.  
  
Rory drew small circles on the counter top with her finger.  
  
"Why so blue?"  
  
She allowed a small smile to creep onto her lips.  
  
"Nothing terminal." She said, looking up at Jess.  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"You know, they say Sharon Osbourne will live?" He offered.  
  
She glared at him playfully.  
  
"It's not that."  
  
"I'm intrigued. Tell me."  
  
"It's nothing, like I said." She shrugged. "Just some girl at school."  
  
"Ah, cat fight?" He smiled.  
  
"Go away." She said, trying not to laugh.  
  
"Ok. I'll go." He walked out from behind the counter and headed for the door. "Are we still on for tonight?" He asked.  
  
"Yeah. You're getting the movie?"  
  
"Well, it is my turn." He smiled.  
  
"Ok, see you then."  
  
"Ok." He nodded, opening the door.  
  
He stopped and watched as she went back to pouting.  
  
"Rory?"  
  
"Yeah?" She asked, turning on her stool to look at him.  
  
"He's not the Messiah."  
  
Rory smiled widely.  
  
"He's a very naughty boy!" She giggled.  
  
Jess winked at her and left. She followed him with her eyes until she couldn't see him any more.  
  
"Oh, good. You look happier." Luke said, placing a coffee on the counter next to her.  
  
"Yeah." She nodded. "Jess made me laugh."  
  
"Jess?" Luke frowned. "Since when did he become a comedian to anyone other than himself?"  
  
"Oh… it was a private joke."  
  
"Ah… that would explain why I never find him funny." Luke sighed, rolling his eyes.  
  


*****

  
  
"You're late, Mariano." Dean shouted breathlessly.  
  
"You're into extra time anyway, Forester." Jess called back from the bleachers, not looking up from his book.  
  
"You read too much."  
  
"How else do you think I come up with all my intellectually stimulating conversation?"  
  
Dean shook his head and ran back to the soccer game he was playing in. Jess glanced up and rolled his eyes at Dean. Jess wasn't a 'team player', so he found the idea of 'team sports' amusing.  
  
He continued to read until the game was over and then he sat and waited for Dean to finish giving and receiving pat's on the back from his fellow players.  
  
"Oh my gosh!" Jess said dramatically, standing up when Dean started walking over to him.  
  
"Not again…" Sighed Dean.  
  
"Give me a D!" Jess cheered, waving his arms around as if he had pom-poms in them.  
  
"Every week." Dean shook his head.  
  
"Give me an E!"  
  
"If you don't cut it out I'll give you a black eye." Dean said, unable to stop him self from smiling a little.  
  
"Sorry man, I just can't help myself."  
  
"I know. You're a moron. It comes naturally." Dean smiled at his own joke. "What are you reading anyway?" He frowned.  
  
"Oh, Rory gave it to me." He said, looking at the cover.  
  
"Man, I gotta' start reading more." Sighed Dean enviously.  
  
"Well if you do, don't let her recommend books." Jess joked.  
  
"I'm serious. You two have that whole book thing going on."  
  
"Yes, It's called reading."  
  
"Ha ha! I just… don't have anything like that with her."  
  
"I'm sure you'll find something." Said Jess, trying to be supportive.  
  
Dean grabbed the book Jess was holding and read the cover.  
  
"'A Users Guide To The Brain'?" Dean Chuckled. "She knows you well then?"  
  
Jess snatched the book back and hit Dean with it.  
  
"It's not like the 'English For Dummies' books you read." He shot back.  
  
Dean wasn't paying attention. He'd spotted Rory crossing the street a few blocks ahead, and was just standing and staring.  
  
Jess looked from Dean to Rory and back again.  
  
"Ok, this is the only time I'll ever say this in my whole life, but… Dude!"  
  
"What?" Asked Dean, not taking his eyes off of Rory.  
  
"They're going to make thrillers about you! 'The Guy Who Loved To Much'." He said, shaking his head.  
  
"Come on, you're telling me she's not attractive?" Dean asked.  
  
"I'm telling you you're one step away from stalker material." He smiled slightly.  
  
"Jess…"  
  
"I'm saying this as a friend. Get over it."  
  
"I can't stop thinking about her. I'm crazy about her." Sighed Dean. "The way she walks, the way she looks, her smile, her eyes, her hair…"  
  
"Oh, Rory, how do I love you? Let me count the ways…" Jess mocked.  
  
"You're seriously unbalanced." Dean muttered and carried on walking.  
  
Jess laughed to himself and caught up to Dean.  
  
"I've got the perfect way to take your mind off of her."  
  
"How?" Dean asked skeptically.  
  
"It's a detailed plan. I'll tell you tonight. Meet me at the diner."  
  
"Ok, but…" Started Dean.  
  
"I gotta' go. 7:30pm. No later." He called as he walked away.  
  
Dean frowned and watched Jess leave.  
  


*****

  
  
Dean stopped at the edge of the Gilmore's front lawn.  
  
"Ok… Jess, I know you have serious mental problems…"  
  
"Just shut up and keep walking."  
  
"I fail to see how coming to Rory's house is going to get Rory off of my mind." He sighed, following Jess to the front porch.  
  
"Because, maybe if you two get together, you'll stop pining for her all the live long day!" Jess sighed. "You'll pin her, she'll tell Mary Sue and Mary Ann, you'll skip through the fields of flowers, get married and do the whole 'Honey, I'm Home' thing."  
  
"You set us up?" Dean frowned.  
  
"Yep." Jess nodded and knocked on the door.  
  
"And Rory knows?" Dean asked.  
  
Rory opened the door and smiled at Jess. Her expression changed to surprise when she saw Dean.  
  
"Nope." Jess smiled.  
  
"Hey…" Rory said uncertainly.  
  
"I brought a buddy." Jess teased. "He's swell."  
  
"Ok. Hey Dean." Laughed Rory, inviting them both in.  
  
"Hey Rory. I'm not intruding am I?"  
  
"No, not at all. The more the merrier." She smiled at him. "Did you get the movie?" She asked Jess.  
  
"Yeah… here." Jess handed her the tape.  
  
"'With Honors'?"  
  
"Sometimes slow, sometimes cheesy, often enlightening." He nodded. "Two thumbs up."  
  
"Great." She said, taking it and heading into the living room.  
  
"I'll leave part way through the movie." Jess said quietly to Dean. "Don't wimp out this time."  
  
Dean smiled gratefully at Jess as they followed Rory over to the couch.  



	3. What's a Felony Between Friends?

** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!**

"Did you kiss her?"  
  
"No."  
  
"What?" Jess stopped and looked at Dean in shock. "I left after 30 minutes! You had soooooo much time!"  
  
"We talked." Dean smiled.  
  
"Oooh, really?" Jess sounded unimpressed.  
  
"It was nice. I don't get to talk to her much." He sighed. "And, I made her laugh." He said proudly.  
  
"Really?! How many times?!"  
  
"Man, you can be such a jerk." Dean shook his head as they walked into the diner.  
  
"I'm sorry. But I have invested a lot of time in this non-relationship. And when I put effort in, I want results!" Jess teased.  
  
"You haven't put any time into anything."  
  
"Uh… I'm sorry, was it not me who spent the past few months listening to your incessant droning about her pretty nose and her perfect hair?" He asked.  
  
Dean glared at him and sat at the counter as Jess walked behind it ready to start work.  
  
"I'm sorry to disappoint you." Dean said, a severe lack of sincerity in his tone.  
  
"Did you at least ask her out during your amazing talk?"  
  
"No." Dean sighed. "I couldn't find the right time."  
  
"Do you want me to ask her? I promise to be totally subtle." He nodded. "I have this friend, and he thinks you're super great!"  
  
"No, thank you." Dean said pointedly.  
  
"Well hurry up and do it yourself then, otherwise I just might be forced to do it for you anyway."  
  
"Do it and die." Dean threatened.  
  
Rory walked over and smiled.  
  
"He bugging you too?" She asked Dean.  
  
He turned suddenly, surprised to see her.  
  
"Oh, uh… yeah." He laughed softly as she took a seat next to him at the counter.  
  
"Glad to see it's not restricted to me." She smiled.  
  
"I am nothing but nice to you!" Jess protested.  
  
"Debatable." Rory grinned.  
  
Jess rolled his eyes and walked into the kitchen, leaving Rory and Dean to talk.  
  
"So… how was your day?" Dean asked.  
  
"Oh, good." She nodded and tucked some hair behind her ear. "I had this horrible biology test but I think I passed it."  
  
Dean watched her every move, mesmerized. She carried on talking for a few minutes and he just sat and smiled.  
  
"Dean?" She frowned.  
  
Jess walked out of the kitchen and cringed.  
  
"Ah! Fire!" He yelled.  
  
"What?" Dean brought himself back to reality and looked at Jess.  
  
"What? What fire?!" Luke demanded, rushing into the kitchen.  
  
"Oh… my mistake." Jess sighed, looking at Dean and mouthing 'wakey, wakey'.  
  
"I'm sorry." Dean blushed ad he turned back to Rory.  
  
"That's ok." She smiled. "Anyway…" She dug around in her back pack and pulled out an envelope.  
  
"What's this?" He asked with a nervous laugh as she handed it to him.  
  
"An invitation to my party." She chuckled. "You know? The one I was just telling you about."  
  
"Oh!" Dean nodded as if he'd been listening.  
  
"Hey, Dodger, here's yours." She said, throwing one across the counter to Jess.  
  
"Oh, truly honored." He said sarcastically.  
  
"Fine, give it back." She said playfully, holding her hand out.  
  
"Nope. Mine." He smiled, holding it away from her. "I shall cherish it always."  
  
"Of course you will." She smiled and rolled her eyes, turning back to Dean. "So, do you think you'll be able to make it?"  
  
"Of course!" He said enthusiastically. "I mean… sure, probably. As long as Taylor doesn't make me work."  
  
"I'll get my mom to harass him until he caves and promises to give you the night off." She laughed softly, picking up her backpack. "I gotta' go."  
  
"Oh, ok." Dean stood up when she did. "I'll uh… see you around?"  
  
"Sure." She nodded and glanced at Jess. "Bye."  
  
"Later Veronica." Jess smiled, busying himself with the cash register.  
  
Rory picked up a straw and threw it at Jess's head like a dart. He didn't even have to look up to know it was coming, and swatted it away with on hand.  
  
Rory smiled to herself and waved to Dean as she left.  
  
"Ok, what was that?" Dean asked.  
  
"What was what?" Jess frowned.  
  
"'Dodger'?"  
  
"Oh. I committed a felony. In her bedroom no less." Jess said deceivingly.  
  
"What?!"  
  
"Jeez, calm down. I 'stole' a book from her room. So she nicknamed me Dodger."  
  
"Why?" Dean laughed slightly.  
  
"Dodger…. Oliver Twist?" Jess waited for Dean to catch on. "Seriously man, pick up a book!" He laughed, walking away.  
  


*****

  
  
Rory sat at the Kim's kitchen table and grimaced as she swallowed her mouthful of food.  
  
"Good, huh?" Lane said sarcastically.  
  
"What's it called again?" Rory asked, drinking half her glass of water trying to get rid of the taste.  
  
"Tofruity." Lane chuckled.  
  
"Great, adding it to the list of things I will never again put in my mouth."  
  
"What's on the list so far?"  
  
"Uh… mud, sand, sprouts and peanut brittle." Rory smiled.  
  
"Short list."  
  
"Yeah, well… I don't wanna limit myself too much in case I get desperate."  
  
"Good point." Lane smiled.  
  
"So, are you coming to my birthday party?"  
  
"Of course. I come every year, and I wouldn't miss your 18th for anything!"  
  
"Don't you have to ask Mama Kim first?"  
  
"I'll wait until she's in a good mood." Lane sighed.  
  
"Good idea." Nodded Rory. "Wanna hear something scandalous?"  
  
"Always." Lane giggled excitedly, leaning in closer to hear what Rory had to say.  
  
"Ok, well… you'll have to settle for slightly interesting." Rory smiled at her best friends enthusiasm.  
  
"Hey, it's better than anything else going on right now."  
  
"Ok…" Rory paused for dramatic effect. "I think Jess is trying to set me up with Dean."  
  
"Dean? Really?" Lane chuckled.  
  
"Yeah." Rory shook her head.  
  
"He's too tall for you. You'd have to spend the rest of your life at a chiropractor." Lane mused.  
  
"He's nice though." Rory shrugged.  
  
"Yeah, he seems nice. And he's not bad to look at." Lane agreed.  
  
"Huh, maybe I should set you and Dean up." Rory teased.  
  
"No thanks. He's not my type. Besides, everyone knows he's totally smitten with you." She sighed.  
  
"Everyone?"  
  
"Uh…" Lane cringed and wished she could take back her last comment.  
  
"Lane…"  
  
"Well, he's not exactly the Stars Hollow High outcast, you know? Girls don't have bad reactions to him. But it's a well known fact that he's only got eyes for one person." Lane explained, pointing at Rory.  
  
"I didn't know."  
  
"You don't go to the same school as us."  
  
"I live in the same small town. I should know this. You should have told me."  
  
"You're right. I'm sorry." Lane apologized.  
  
"Forgiven." Rory smiled.  
  
She thought about what Lane had told her. She wasn't sure if she felt flattered or burdened. She picked up her Tofruity and idly took another bite.  
  
"Oh my gosh." She spat it back on the plate. "Why didn't you stop me?"  
  
Lane bit her lip to stop herself laughing as Rory drank her water urgently.  
  



	4. No Pajamas in the Land of the Dead

A/N: Yes, the title of this chapter is weird. But those of you who have seen 'Glorious' will get the reference. Those of you that haven't:

"No pajamas in the Land of the Dead!"

"I was told pajamas in the brochure."

"I don't think…"

"Yes, pajamas!"

"No."

  
** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!** 

Rory and Jess sat on the Gilmore's couch watching a video. Rory had failed to keep her word about something and Jess was forcing her to watch 'Glorious' for the first time.  
  
Rory burst out laughing, Jess had lost count of how many times she'd done so since they'd started the tape. He smiled at her for a minute and then turned his attention back to the TV.  
  
She sat up a little in her seat and squirmed around. He frowned at her, seeing how hard she was trying to stay on her end of the couch when it was obvious she felt cramped.  
  
"Hey!" She giggled.  
  
Jess grabbed her ankles and pulled her towards him. She slipped down in her seat so she was lying on the couch, her legs across his lap.  
  
"Stop moving, you're ruining this for me." He smiled playfully, pointing at the TV.  
  
They turned back to the video and Rory started laughing softly. She eventually ended up laughing out loud again, almost having trouble breathing.  
  
"Oh no… I got hiccups!" She said, putting her hand over her mouth.  
  
"I told you he was good."  
  
"I know. I'll never doubt you again!" She laughed and hiccupped.  
  
Jess couldn't help laughing as she jolted slightly every few seconds.  
  
"God, I hate hiccups." She sighed.  
  
"I only know two solutions that work."  
  
"Tell me, I'll try anything."  
  
"Well, number one, you have to just try and relax your whole body." He said.  
  
He watched as she took a deep breath and lay still for a moment.  
  
"I did it!" She said excitedly.  
  
"Congratulations." He smiled.  
  
She hiccupped again.  
  
"Ok, what's option number two?" She pouted.  
  
"Close your eyes."  
  
"Why?" She asked hesitantly.  
  
"Just, do it." He smiled, getting up.  
  
"Where are you going."  
  
"No where. Just, close your eyes and wait there."  
  
Rory sighed and closed her eyes. Jess walked into the kitchen and took the ice tray out of the freezer. He tipped two ice cubes into the palm of his hand and snuck back into the living room, hoping she wouldn't know he was back.  
  
He leaned down, one ice cube in each hand, and pressed the ice cubes against the sides of her neck, just under her jaw.  
  
Rory gasped in shock and sat up quickly.  
  
"What the hell was that?" She asked.  
  
Jess just smiled and waited. She didn't hiccup.  
  
"Wow… it worked?" She smiled in surprise, wiping the small water trails from the side of her neck.  
  
"What happened to never doubting me again?" He asked, pretending to be offended.  
  
"It was all a lot of big talk." She smiled.  
  
"Don't you trust me?" He asked, sitting down beside her again.  
  
She looked at him thoughtfully.  
  
"You need to deliberate?!" He exclaimed.  
  
"I'm just teasing." She smiled, resting back on the couch and trying to watch the video again. "I trust you."  
  
He looked at her briefly. She was looking at the TV. He shrugged and laughed quietly to himself.  
  


*****

  
  
Lorelai hurried around the Inn.  
  
"Michel!" She shouted in an agitated tone.  
  
"What now?" He sighed  
  
"Where's the 'Happy Birthday' banner? It's supposed to be over the main door!"  
  
"Oh yes." He gave her a brief, fake smile. "I am afraid of heights."  
  
"Well then why didn't you tell me when I asked you to put it up?!" She moaned.  
  
"Whoops!" He placed his index finger over his mouth. "It slipped my mind."  
  
Lorelai glared at the back of his head as he walked away. She had a good mind to make him get his butt up a ladder, phobia or no.  
  
"Hey."  
  
"Sookie. My lucky penny! Pleeeeaaaase tell me that everything is ok on the food front." Lorelai begged.  
  
"Calm down. Everything is fine! I just started…" Sookie stopped and sniffed a few times.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Do you smell… burning sugar?" She frowned.  
  
"No… I don't smell anythi…"  
  
"I smell burning sugar!" Sookie yelled, throwing her hands in the air and running back in to the kitchen.  
  
Lorelai rested her head in her hands a pouted.  
  
"Hey mom."  
  
She smiled slightly and looked over as Rory and Lane made their way to the front desk.  
  
"Hey birthday girl and birthday girl's friend."  
  
"How's it going?" Lane asked.  
  
"It's…."  
  
"Burning!" Came Sookie's voice from the kitchen.  
  
"Yeah, that about sums it up." Nodded Lorelai.  
  
"Is it ok if we go get ready?" Rory asked excitedly.  
  
"Sure." Lorelai reached under the desk and pulled out a room key.  
  
"Thanks. See you in a little while." Rory waved a little as she and Lane hurried off upstairs to change.  
  
Lorelai's smile faded as she returned to worrying about the party. Sookie reappeared with a large brown stain down the front of her uniform.  
  
"What happened?" Lorelai asked, concerned.  
  
"The sugar was burning… so I went to turn off the heat, and then the port… and I told him not to, and the chocolate sauce…" Sookie reached her arms out in front of her and then brought them quickly back to her chest. "And it stained." She sighed.  
  
Lorelai mock cried and ran her hand through her hair.  
  
_This party is already a disaster!_  
  
  



	5. The Princess and The Stable Boy

A/N: Thanks for all the great reviews. I realize some people may stop reading after this chapter, so... thanks for coming this far and sorry it's not a fic you feel you want to continue reading.

** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!**

"For the last time, I think she'll love it!" Sighed Jess.  
  
"Really?" Dean asked.  
  
"Oh my god! Can you please strangle me with it?!"  
  
"OK, alright." Dean sighed, putting the friendship bracelet in his pocket. "What did you get her?"  
  
"Nothing."  
  
"Nothing as in Nothing, or Nothing as in you're not telling me?" Dean frowned as they opened the main door to the Inn.  
  
"Nothing as in Nothing." Jess shrugged. "I'm the best present anyone could ever get!"  
  
Dean rolled his eyes and laughed.  
  
"At least I don't have to worry about you getting her the better gift then."  
  
"Yeah, for once in your life, you've got one up on me." Jess smiled.  
  
They both stopped in their tracks when they saw Lorelai on the ladder by the door.  
  
"Hey, can you give me a hand?" She said, trying to reach to put the banner up.  
  
"Sure." Dean waited for Lorelai to get down and then he climbed the ladder.  
  
"Hey Jess." Rory smiled and walked over.  
  
"Happy birthday." He smiled.  
  
"Thank You." She nodded. "Hi Dean." She called up to him.  
  
Dean looked down at her and tried to wave without letting go of the banner.  
  
"Ooh, be careful!" Lorelai gasped. "You have insurance right?"  
  
"I'll be fine." Laughed Dean.  
  
"Rory, this is ridiculous. I'm surrounded by a bunch of people, who's totaled IQ is still way below average! I actually miss Madeline and Louise!"  
  
"Oh… Hey Paris. This is Jess and Dean." Rory smiled slightly.  
  
"Wonderful. Let me ask you something Jeff."  
  
"It's Jess." He sighed.  
  
"Whatever! Do you know who Seamus Heaney is?"  
  
"Yes." He frowned.  
  
"Seriously?"  
  
"Irish poet." He chuckled.  
  
"Good… you're coming with me. Thank god someone in this building has something more interesting to talk about than 'The Bachelor'." She said, pushing him ahead of her and walking away.  
  
"Uh… bye." Laughed Rory.  
  
"What was that?" Asked Dean, getting down off of the ladder.  
  
"That was Paris." Rory smiled.  
  
"She's… interesting." He nodded.  
  
"Nice choice of words."  
  
Dean looked around nervously.  
  
"Can I get you a drink?" Rory offered.  
  
"A drink would be great." He smiled more.  
  


*****

  
  
Rory pulled her coat on and stepped outside. It was getting late and a lot of people had already left. Dean had just left and Lorelai was trying to clean up a bit.  
  
She breathed in deeply and closed her eyes. Instead of breathing in fresh air, she breathed in cigarette smoke and started chocking.  
  
"Jess." She groaned.  
  
Jess's face took on a guilty expression and he quickly stubbed his cigarette out on the porch railing.  
  
"Sorry."  
  
"You said you quit."  
  
"I did. Then I met Paris." He smiled. "She's…"  
  
"Interesting?" Rory said, allowing herself to smile a little.  
  
"Yeah." He nodded and they both laughed a little.  
  
"Did Dean show you what he got me?" She asked, holding out her wrist.  
  
"Yeah." He nodded. "Do you like it?"  
  
"Yeah, it's great. No one's ever made me a gift before." She said thoughtfully, playing with the bracelet.  
  
"Sorry I didn't get you anything." He said.  
  
"That's ok. I didn't expect you to."  
  
"Why?" He frowned.  
  
"I dunno… I just have learnt not to expect things from you." She smiled.  
  
"I think I'm offended." He nodded, sitting on the porch swing.  
  
"Oh, don't be. I didn't mean it in a bad way."  
  
"Ok." He nodded as she sat beside him. "So, did you like the party?"  
  
"Yeah, it was nice."  
  
"What did you wish for?" He asked.  
  
"When?"  
  
"When you blew out the candles on your cake. What did you wish for?"  
  
"Oh… I can't tell you. It won't come true." She said, shaking her head.  
  
"It's not likely to come true anyway."  
  
"There's the positive attitude I love." She sighed, rolling her eyes.  
  
"Well, have any of your birthday wishes ever come true?"  
  
"Yes. When I was 5 I wished for a best friend. And the next year I met Lane."  
  
"Awww… How sweet." He smiled softly. "But it's probably just more of a coincidence then a wish come true."  
  
"Don't ruin it." She pouted.  
  
"You're 18 today you know. You're an adult. Adults don't pout."  
  
"Gilmore adults do." She grinned defiantly.  
  
He leaned back on the swing and took a deep breath. He was surprised when he felt her rest against him slightly.  
  
"Tired?" He asked, looking at her head resting on his shoulder.  
  
"A little." She nodded, looking up at him. "You?"  
  
"Not really." He chuckled. "Want me to tell you a bedtime story?"  
  
"Yeah. Make it a good one." She ordered.  
  
"Ok. There was this beautiful princess…"  
  
"Called?"  
  
"Rory, of course."  
  
"Good."  
  
"And it was her birthday. So the prince brought her a bracelet."  
  
"Who's the prince?" She asked excitedly.  
  
"Oh, he's Prince Dean of Chumpville." He said seriously and Rory giggled. "Anyway, the princess really loved her bracelet. But what she liked even better was the witty charm of the humble stable boy."  
  
"Who's the stable boy?"  
  
"Jeff." He said, as if it should be obvious. She laughed a little.  
  
"Does Jeff think the princess is beautiful?" She asked, sitting up a little and looking at him.  
  
Jess looked at her and smiled softly.  
  
"Very."  
  
"Does the princess like Jeff more than the prince?" She asked, her smile fading slowly.  
  
"I think she's warming up to the prince." He nodded.  
  
"And Jeff?" She asked. Jess shrugged and looked away. Rory sighed. "I think she likes Jeff."  
  
Jess looked at her, wondering what she was thinking.  
  
"Why?" He asked.  
  
"Because Jeff makes her laugh." She smiled.  
  
Jess swallowed hard and tried to smile back. She leaned forward and pressed her lips against his. Jess closed his eyes and kissed her back gently, bringing his hand up to the side of her face.  
  
They stopped and looked at each other.  
  
"The prince is so gonna kick the stable boys ass." Jess said quietly.  
  
"Sorry." Rory said gently.  
  
Jess kissed her again.  
  
  
  
  



	6. ClutzMan, The AntiLuke!

A/N: Yay! You liked it. hehe. I'm so glad. Also glad because one of my favorite Lit authors liked it. (look at me giddy!) Anyway... hope I don't disappoint from here onwards...

** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!**

Luke watched Jess suspiciously. He was knocking over glasses and dropping things and it was mainly because he spent all his time watching the door.  
  
"Hey, Tweedle Dum." He sighed finally, unable to watch Jess drop another pancake on the floor.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Yeah, you." He said, grabbing Jess by the collar of his shirt and dragging him behind the counter.  
  
"What are you doing?"  
  
"I could ask you the same thing."  
  
"What are you talking about?" Jess sighed.  
  
"You're like ClutzMan, the anti-Luke!" He said under his breath.  
  
"I just got a lot of things on my mind."  
  
"Well, try and put your mind on your work, and maybe you'll feel better."  
  
"Thanks for the advice." Jess said sarcastically.  
  
Rory stepped into the diner and smiled nervously at Jess.  
  
"Hi." She said uncertainly.  
  
"Hi." He nodded. "I'm on break." He said to Luke, motioning for Rory to follow him upstairs.  
  
"Thank the lord. Maybe now people can stop eating off of the floor!" Luke said as Rory and Jess disappeared behind the curtain.  
  
Jess led Rory up to the apartment above the diner and let her in. Neither of them spoke. Rory walked to the middle of the room and stood waiting for Jess to say something. He stayed by the door, looking at anything but her.  
  
"Uh… should I speak first?" She asked hesitantly.  
  
"Do you know what you want to say?"  
  
"Kind of…"  
  
"Then yeah, you should probably go first." He nodded.  
  
"Ok." She took a deep breath and looked around the room. "About… the kiss last night. Or… Kisses. I think there was more than one."  
  
"There was." He sighed, looking at the floor.  
  
"Ok, about the kisses last night." She paused. "You know what… I think that's all I got so far." She blushed and he couldn't help but smile a little.  
  
"I guess it's my turn then." He said, still standing by the door, afraid to get to close to her. "We shouldn't have kissed."  
  
"Oh." Her face fell and she looked away.  
  
"I… am really sorry." He sighed. "I just can't… Dean's like…"  
  
"Your best friend." Rory nodded.  
  
"Yeah. I guess he is." Jess nodded.  
  
"I understand…" She started.  
  
"It's not just that." He said, taking a step forward.  
  
He thought for a minute and decided it was best to just say what he was thinking instead of trying to buffer it.  
  
"You're probably the closest friend I've ever had." He said quietly. "And I don't want to screw that up."  
  
"Me either." She said, taking a step towards him. He backed away. "Jess…"  
  
"I think it's safest if I stay over here and you stay over there." He said apologetically.  
  
"Ok."  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"I know, you already said you were." She sighed.  
  
"Well… I am." He shook his head. "I can't believe I screwed this up so badly." He laughed bitterly.  
  
"I kissed you." She offered as a consolation.  
  
"The first time." He said, looking her in the eyes. "You kissed me, and I kissed you back. Then I kissed you…"  
  
"And I kissed you back."  
  
"We shouldn't have." He repeated.  
  
"Ok." She said, trying to stop herself crying. "I'm getting the feeling that you think this is the biggest mistake you ever made."  
  
"Rory, it's not like that…"  
  
"Then how is it?" She said, letting the tears spill over and run down her cheeks.  
  
"Rory…" He pleaded, looking down at the floor.  
  
"I know Dean is your best friend. And I know he likes me. And I know you don't want to hurt him. Neither do I." She cried.  
  
"Which is why we shouldn't have…"  
  
"But I don't want him, I want you."  
  
Jess closed his eyes and took a deep breath.  
  
"Please take that back." He murmured.  
  
"What about you?" She asked.  
  
"What about me?" He sighed. He didn't matter.  
  
"What do you want?"  
  
"I want to not hurt two of the best friends I've ever had. That'd be a good start."  
  
"Jess…"  
  
"I can't have this conversation with you, Rory." He shook his head. "Not right now."  
  
"When?" She asked.  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"This isn't going to go away." She insisted.  
  
"Maybe if we pretend it never happened, it will."  
  
"Jess, come on…"  
  
"What? Have you got any other ideas?" He asked, frustrated with himself and the situation he'd put them all in.  
  
"Yes. I tell Dean I don't like him the same way he likes me, and that I like you."  
  
"Because…?" Jess paused, waiting to hear the reasoning behind her plan.  
  
"Because if he cares about your feelings as much as you do about his, then he'll put aside whatever it is he feels for me and let us be together."  
  
Jess shook his head.  
  
"What?" She asked. "You don't think he will?"  
  
Jess started pacing by the door.  
  
"Well then what?" She stopped and looked at him. "Oh." Her eyes took on a sad look of realization.  
  
"Oh, what?" He frowned.  
  
"I don't want Dean." She looked down at her shoes. " And you… don't want me." She nodded slightly.  
  
"Rory…" He started gently.  
  
"It's ok… I get it." She said, hurrying over to the door.  
  
Although every part of him was desperate to stop her leaving, he found himself moving away from the door and giving her unopposed access to it.  
  
"I'll see you around." She said as she hurried down the stairs.  
  
Jess ran his hand through his hair and banged fist against the doorframe.  
He stood for a minute trying to get everything straight in his mind and figure out what the least painful solution was.  
  
He walked over to the window and peered out of the blinds, watching Rory walking across the street.  
  
All rational thoughts left his mind and he impulsively ran to the door, down the stairs and out of the diner before Luke could protest.  
  
"Rory!" He shouted as he ran after her.  
  
She blinked back tears and quickened her pace, she didn't know if she was more humiliated, hurt or heartbroken.  
  
"Rory, wait!"  
  
He dodged other people and carried on running after her.  
  
"Please Jess… just…" She was cut off as he abruptly pulled her into the bookstore and over to the back row of shelves, where it was quiet.  
  
He was out of breath and didn't know if he could kiss her for more than a second or two, but he pulled her to him anyway and kissed her deeply.  
  
They pulled apart slightly, Jess breathless from running and Rory breathless from crying, both breathless from their kiss.  
  
"It's definitely not because I don't want you." He whispered and she laughed softly.  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	7. Secret Lovers, That's What We Are

** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!**

Dean looked around the diner and frowned before looking at his watch.  
  
"What can I get you?" Asked Luke.  
  
"Uh… a coffee." He sighed.  
  
"No problem."  
  
"Do you know where Jess is?" He asked.  
  
"Actually… No, I don't." Luke said looking around, suddenly wondering the same thing.  
  
Rory leaned back on the boxes she was sitting on and laughed softly as Jess's lips moved from hers and traveled slowly down her neck.  
  
"This is wrong." She said unconvincingly.  
  
"I know." He said in between kisses.  
  
"Someone could walk in." She smiled as he looked up at her.  
  
They both looked over at the storeroom door and then at each other. They smiled and started kissing again, more passionately.  
  
After a few minutes, Jess drew back and looked at her thoughtfully.  
  
"What?" She smiled softly.  
  
"It's just odd." He said, stepping back and shaking his head.  
  
"What is?"  
  
"You… me." He ran his hand through his hair and started pacing slightly. "Last week you were just… Rory. This smart, funny beautiful girl that I was friends with. And now… you're _Rory_. And you're still all the above…"  
  
"But?"  
  
"But now…" He laughed quietly. "I just… can't stop thinking about you and wanting to kiss you…"  
  
"You can kiss me." She nodded. "You _should_ kiss me."  
  
"I shouldn't…"  
  
They stared at each other for a moment. He smiled and walked back over to her, kissing her strongly. His hands moved slowly down her sides and he slid his fingers just under the edge of her shirt. She giggled feeling his fingertips brush so lightly against her skin.  
  
"We need to stop." He sighed regretfully.  
  
She nodded, understanding. He stepped back, allowing her room to get off of the boxes and straighten her top.  
  
"Ready?" He asked and she nodded again.  
  
They walked over to the door and he opened it slowly, looking out. When he saw Dean at the counter he shut it quickly.  
  
"What's wrong?" She frowned.  
  
"Dean's out there." He sighed, the guilt crushed the happiness he'd been feeling moments earlier.  
  
"Oh." She cringed and shuffled her feet nervously. "So what do we do?"  
  
Jess looked around the room, trying to think of a way for both of them to get out of the storeroom without Luke or Dean seeing.  
  
"Ok… I'll go out and distract them…" He started, still thinking it through. "Then… you can sneak out of the back door?"  
  
"That might work." She shrugged. She had no better idea's to offer.  
  
"Here goes."  
  
He kissed her again quickly and she smiled at him.  
  
Jess opened the door again and stepped out cautiously, glancing back at Rory once to make sure she was doing ok.  
  
Dean and Luke still hadn't noticed. He pulled the door closed behind him, but didn't shut it completely.  
  
"Hey." He smiled, hoping he didn't look too suspicious.  
  
"Where have you been?" Asked Luke.  
  
"Upstairs…" Jess said.  
  
"Well now you're here, you can start doing some work." Luke smirked, handing him a coffee pot.  
  
"Ok." He nodded.  
  
"Hey." Dean gave him a small smile.  
  
"Oh, hey! Uh… I'll be back in a minute." Jess said nervously, hurrying over to the window.  
  
He stood there for a moment and pretended to look like he was watching something.  
  
"Luke… you better come and see this." He called. "Taylor's got a measuring tape…"  
  
"What?!" Luke put his coffee pot down and hurried over, Dean smiled curiously and followed.  
  
Rory snuck out of the storeroom quietly and left through the back door without anyone noticing.  
  
"I don't see him…" Said Luke.  
  
"Oh… well, I swear I just saw him…" Jess insisted.  
  
"Yeah, well, next time you see him tell him to stay where he is." Luke grunted. "If he's planning something I wanna' know what it is so I can tell him how much I hate it."  
  
Dean laughed and shook his head at Luke. Jess's laugh was filled more with relief than amusement. Then he looked at Dean and felt like the worst person in the world, and his laughter stopped.  
  


*****

  
  
"I can't believe I had to be home at 10pm the other night." Lane pouted as she and Rory walked down Main Street. "I bet you all just partied away until the early hours of the morning…"  
  
"Lane…" Rory giggled.  
  
"One big rave." She continued. "And I was at home. Reading."  
  
"It wasn't one big rave." Rory assured her.  
  
"Did I miss anything?" Lane sighed.  
  
"Well…" Rory hesitated.  
  
"I did! I knew it. You have to tell me!" Lane insisted.  
  
Lane was right. She had to tell her. She had to tell someone, and Lane was the only person she was sure would just be excited for her and not try and help her figure it all out within a matter of minutes.  
  
"Ok. But… you can't tell anyone."  
  
"I promise!" Lane grinned, linking her arm with Rory's.  
  
"Well… after pretty much everyone had left the party… I kissed…" Rory stopped when she saw Dean and Jess walking towards them.  
  
"Who?!" Lane asked impatiently.  
  
Rory stood and waited as they approached. Lane stared at her, waiting for an answer.  
  
"Hi." Dean smiled at her as they passed.  
  
"Hey." She said, smiling back a little.  
  
Jess and Dean kept walking. Jess turned his head a little and smiled at Rory. She blushed and smiled back.  
  
"Who…"  
  
Lane looked from Jess to Rory. Studied their smiles, noticed Rory's blush.  
  
"Oh my god!!!" She squealed, causing everyone near her to turn and look, including Dean and Jess.  
  
"What?" Rory asked.  
  
"You… you and…"  
  
Rory could see she had figured it out, and she panicked.  
  
"Lane… shhhh!"  
  
"You, and..." Lane's eyes were wide, she raised her arm to point at Jess but Rory grabbed it and dragged her into the nearest shop.  
  
"What was that?" Laughed Dean.  
  
"I… don't know." Jess said, laughing along with him. Hoping he didn't sound as worried as he was.  
  
Rory pushed Lane further into the shop. Lane was still wide-eyed and pointing out of the door as she was backed away from anyone that might hear.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"You and Jess?" Lane asked finally.  
  
Rory nodded.  
  
"But you can't tell anyone. Please." Rory begged.  
  
"What about Dean?"  
  
"Yeah… that's why you can't tell anyone." Rory sighed, feeling bad for coming between Dean and Jess.  
  
"This is… wow…." Lane shook her head.  
  
"It's not so… wow." Rory said, trying to stop Lane getting excited again.  
  
"Can I sing 'Secret Lovers'?" She grinned.  
  
"I'd really rather you didn't." Rory smiled as they walked back out onto the street.  
  
"Just one verse." Lane pleaded, bouncing around a little.  
  
"The chorus. That's all." Rory smiled, rolling her eyes.  
  
"Yay!" Lane cleared her throat. "_Secret Lovers, that's what we are. Shouldn't be together, but we can't let go, oh no. Cos we love each other soooo…_"  
  
"Very good." Rory laughed.  
  
"_Here we are, the two of us together, taking this crazy chance to be alone. We both kn…_"  
  
"You're done now." Rory smiled, clamping her hand down over Lane's mouth.  
  
Lane continued to try and sing through Rory's hand as they walked. People looked at them strangely and they both started laughing as they opened the gate and walked up the path to 'Kim's Antiques'.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	8. Oops, I Forgot My Pocketknife

** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!**

Jess sat at the kitchen table in Luke's apartment with his head in his hands. He'd spent most of the day before with Dean. And even though Dean didn't know about Jess and Rory, Jess still felt like Dean was waiting for him to slip up and confess. And he'd wanted to.  
  
And every time Dean had talked about Rory, Jess had felt even worse. Especially when Dean brought up the subject of Rory's party and how much fun they'd had hanging out and talking.  
  
"Hey."  
  
His heartbeat quickened slightly and he turned around.  
  
"What are you doing here?" He asked softly as Rory walked over and sat down in the chair next to him.  
  
"I just… wanted to see you." She smiled slightly. "Are you ok?"  
  
"Not really." He said, shaking his head.  
  
"Dean?" She asked.  
  
"Yeah. I feel so…" He looked down at his hands on the table. "I can't believe I'm doing something so crappy to him."  
  
She reached out and took hold of his hand.  
  
"Is this ok?" She asked, not sure what he was thinking or if he'd changed his mind about them being together.  
  
"Depends on what you mean by ok." He said, looking up at her.  
  
"I mean… do you want me to touch you at all? Or are we back to standing on opposite sides of the room?"  
  
"No… it's ok." He said, squeezing her hand slightly.  
  
"Are you having second thoughts?"  
  
He looked her in the eyes and then looked back down at the table.  
  
"No…" He sighed. He wasn't sure if it was true. He didn't doubt how he felt about her, but he didn't know if he could face Dean if he kissed her again.  
  
He let go of her hand and stood up, leaning on the back of his chair.  
  
"I don't know if it's better to tell him or to just… hope that he moves on."  
  
"I know."  
  
"I just feel like I'm betraying him whenever I'm even in the same room as you." He sighed.  
  
"You're not." She said, standing up. "I know he cares about me, but that doesn't make me his."  
  
"I know…"  
  
"So you're not doing anything you shouldn't." She continued.  
  
"Rory, I'm his best friend. I shouldn't be kissing a girl when I know he likes her."  
  
"So we all get to be miserable?" She frowned. "We can't be together because Dean might get hurt. I can't have you and neither of you can have me?"  
  
She was right. It didn't make any sense.  
  
He took a step towards her, and reached out, touching her hand lightly with his. She stepped forward slowly. They kissed gently and then smiled at each other.  
  
"You have to stop doing that." He said, half seriously.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because you make me forget."  
  
"Good." She smiled, kissing him again.  
  
He put his arms around her waist, and she let her fingers move into his hair. Their kisses quickly got more intense.  
  
"What the hell…?!"  
  
They jumped apart.  
  
"Luke!"  
  
"Yeah, Uncle Luke, just minding his own business, coming into his own apartment, seeing his nephew …" He tried to shake the vision out of his head.  
  
"It's not what it looks like…" Jess started.  
  
"Please tell me that your mother knows about this." Luke sighed, looking to Rory for an answer.  
  
She looked at the floor and shook her head.  
  
"Oh god." He groaned, taking his cap off and rubbing his forehead. "You should go." He said. Rory nodded quickly and glanced a Jess before leaving.  
  
"Luke… I can explain…"  
  
"I don't know if I want you to." Luke said, sitting down. "The more I know the deader I am."  
  
Jess sighed and sat down opposite Luke.  
  
"Are you two…" Luke started and then looked at Jess, hoping he'd catch on.  
  
"No." Jess said quickly.  
  
"Are you planning on…"  
  
"We… I…" Jess didn't have an answer for him.  
  
"How long have you been… doing that." He said, pointing to the spot where he'd seen them kissing.  
  
"Since her birthday."  
  
"Well then you definitely shouldn't be planning on…" Luke shook his head again and got up.  
  
"We're not. At least… we haven't talked about it." Jess said, hoping to calm him down.  
  
"Good. Don't do it."  
  
"Are you going to tell Lorelai?" Jess asked.  
  
Luke started pacing.  
  
"I… it's not my place to. Rory should tell her." He said finally. "Is Rory going to tell her?"  
  
"We hadn't talked about that either." Jess admitted. "We're kind of… not telling anyone."  
  
"Yeah, I had noticed." Luke said sarcastically.  
  
"It's just that… Dean really likes Rory too… and he doesn't know she and I like each other. I mean… he knows we're friends, but he thinks that's all."  
  
"How do you find messes like this and then manage to plant yourself firmly in the middle of them?" Luke asked in disbelief.  
  
Neither of them said anything else. Luke left and went back down to the diner. Jess sat back down at the kitchen table and tried to figure out what he should do.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	9. Cruel to be Kind, in the Right Measure

A/N: Any Dean fans still reading should _please_ keep reading after this chapter. Trust me, I'm not as cruel as I first seem!

** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!**

Rory stepped down off of the bus and was about to pull her backpack over her shoulder when a hand stopped her.  
  
"Let me."  
  
"You don't have to." She smiled slightly.  
  
"It looks heavy." Dean smiled back.  
  
"It is heavy. That's why you don't have to carry it."  
  
"And what kind of a gentleman would I be if I didn't?" He said, taking it and carrying it for her.  
  
"So… how are you?" She asked uncertainly.  
  
"Good, actually." He nodded and then realized they were standing still. "Can I walk you home?" He asked hopefully.  
  
"Uh… sure." She said, starting to walk.  
  
"I actually have another question I wanted to ask you." He said nervously.  
  
"Ok." She said, trying not to let her feelings of dread seep into her tone.  
  
"For… a while now… I've been wanting to ask you out." He started.  
  
"Out?" She asked, pretending she didn't know.  
  
"Yeah, like… on a date." He smiled.  
  
"Oh." She forced a smile.  
  
"But I was kinda' nervous, and then whenever I did try, something always got in the way and I couldn't." He said.  
  
She just nodded and kept walking.  
  
"So I was hoping that maybe you'd like to go to a movie with me? Or… get something to eat at Luke's sometime?" He offered.  
  
Rory panicked. She didn't know what to say.  
  
"That's really sweet." She smiled and blushed.  
  
They walked in silence the rest of the way to her house.  
  
"So… what do you say?" He asked as they reached her front porch.  
  
"Um… I don't know." She said apologetically. "You're a really great guy… and I like you as a friend…"  
  
"Oh." He laughed softly and looked away, embarrassed. "That's ok."  
  
"Are you ok?" She asked.  
  
"Yeah, yeah." He nodded. "Totally fine."  
  
"Ok."  
  
"I'll uh… see you." He smiled and she nodded as he left.  
  
Rory felt horrible, but she also felt like a weight had been lifted. She'd known he was going to ask her out, she just hadn't know when it would happen. It had happened. It was over.  
  
"Hey."  
  
She turned around.  
  
"Hey you." She smiled and kissed Jess. "I just talked to Dean."  
  
"Oh?" He looked worried.  
  
"He asked me out. I turned him down. I was very gentle… I think."  
  
Jess nodded and smiled slightly. She kissed him again and he put his arms around her.  
  
"Oh man, I feel like such an idio…" Dean stopped when he saw Rory and Jess kissing. "Such an idiot." He finished.  
  
"Dean…" Rory started.  
  
"I… forgot to give you your bag." He said coldly, putting it down on the front lawn. He turned his attention to Jess and shook his head in disbelief.  
  
"Listen…"  
  
"Save it Jess." He sneered.  
  
Dean turned and walked away without saying anything else.  
  
"Do you think you should go talk to him?" Rory asked quietly.  
  
"I don't know." Said Jess, staring after him.  
  


*****

  
  
"I need a bubble bath. My day was horrible. Don't even try and say yours was worse because it's not possi…" Lorelai stopped, halfway through taking off her coat.  
  
"Hey." Rory said quietly.  
  
Lorelai frowned at Jess and Rory. They were curled up on the couch together. He had his arms around her and she was running her hands through his hair gently.  
  
"Uh… hey." She pointed at them. "Why do you two look like a couple?"  
  
"Because we are." Rory said, smiling slightly. Jess didn't look up.  
  
Lorelai laughed and nodded.  
  
"Good one. But seriously…"  
  
"Seriously." Rory said, resting her head against his.  
  
"Ok…" Lorelai's smile faded and she shook her head in confusion. "Why do you look so miserable then?"  
  
"Long story." Rory said softly looking Lorelai in the eyes.  
  
Lorelai nodded, understanding that it was a story for another time, and headed upstairs quietly.  
  


*****

  
  
Lorelai stared at Luke, open-mouthed.  
  
"You knew?" She said accusingly.  
  
"Not… I didn't…"  
  
"You knew?!"  
  
"I didn't wanna' know!" He said defensively.  
  
Jess wiped down the counter, Rory watched him, wishing there was something she could do to make him feel better.  
  
"How long ago did you find out?"  
  
"Two days… Maybe… three…" Luke shrugged, trying to avoid her shocked gaze.  
  
"I can't believe you didn't tell me when you found out!" She gasped.  
  
"I'm sorry…" Luke offered.  
  
"Sorry doesn't cut it, mister!" She muttered.  
  
Dean opened the door and stepped inside. He looked over at Rory and Jess. Jess was standing behind the counter, Rory was sitting opposite him holding his hand in hers and talking to him. He was just nodding, he looked depressed.  
  
They both looked over at him and Rory slowly let go of Jess's hand. Dean sighed and shook his head, turning and leaving.  
  
Jess hurried out from behind the counter and over to the door.  
  
"Dean, wait!" He shouted.  
  
"I don't have anything to say to you." Dean said angrily, not turning to look at Jess.  
  
"Then why were you here?"  
  
"Mistake. I thought I could talk to you, but it turns out that I can't stand the sight of you." He said.  
  
"Look… I'm sorry…"  
  
"Yeah? Me too. I can't believe you would go behind my back!" Dean shouted, finally turning to look at him.  
  
"I didn't… I mean… It wasn't something I did on purpose…."  
  
"How long?"  
  
Jess looked down at the ground.  
  
"Not long…"  
  
"How long?" Dean demanded. "A week? A month? Longer?"  
  
"No. Not even a week." Jess sighed.  
  
"You knew how much I liked her. You knew and you did it anyway!"  
  
"I didn't plan to. I didn't realize that I felt that way about her…" He said quietly. "She was just a friend."  
  
"Well she wasn't just a friend to me. I was crazy about her!"  
  
"I know."  
  
"No, you don't. You have no clue how much I cared about her!"  
  
"Yes I do." Jess said, looking him in the eyes.  
  
"I know you Jess."  
  
"What does that mean?" Jess frowned.  
  
"This is just some… game to you. You don't 'care' about girls the way I cared about her."  
  
"You're wrong." Jess shook his head.  
  
"That's the thing. I'm not. What's it about? Sex?" Dean asked.  
  
"You're angry…" Jess sighed trying not to let Dean's comments get to him.  
  
"Yeah, I am!" Dean shouted.  
  
"Maybe we should talk when you're less upset…"  
  
"I'm not going to get less upset!" Dean laughed resentfully.  
  
"What do you want me to do?"  
  
"There isn't anything you can do."  
  
"Do you want me to lie down in the middle of the street and let you kick the shit out of me? Would that make you feel better?" He said. "If it'll fix any of this then I'll do it!"  
  
"No. That'll make you feel better, feel like we're even…"  
  
"Then what can I do?!" Jess asked desperately.  
  
"You can stop seeing Rory." Dean said. The words seemed to shock him as they left his mouth, as if it wasn't him saying it. But after a moment he nodded. "Stop seeing her." He repeated.  
  
Jess frowned.  
  
"Completely?"  
  
"Yeah." Dean nodded. "I don't know that I can ever be… your friend again. If we were even friends at all…"  
  
"We were…"  
  
"Then stop seeing Rory. It's the only way I can stand to be anywhere near you."  
  
"I can't…"  
  
"Then don't." Sighed Dean. "But there's nothing else you can do that will even come close to fixing this."  
  
Dean walked away and left Jess standing alone on the side walk.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	10. Standing on the Bridge, Waiting in the D...

A/N: Yes, this chapters title is referring to the Avril song 'I'm With You'. I'm not a fan of hers but I was listening to that song when I wrote this.

Oh, and just to point out to anyone who somehow managed to _not_ catch on: I'm a drama queen!

** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!**

It was raining pretty hard as Rory ran towards the bridge. She pulled her hood up over her head and kept going, ignoring the puddles she was treading in.  
  
She stopped at the end of the bridge and looked at Jess. He was sitting, with his legs hanging over the edge. He wasn't wearing a jacket, he didn't even seem to be aware it was raining.  
  
"Jess."  
  
Rory walked slowly over to him.  
  
"You disappeared… I was worried…"  
  
"Sorry." He sighed.  
  
She looked around, everything was soaked, including her. She pushed her hood back off of her head and sat down beside him  
  
"Are you ok?" She asked gently.  
  
"Not really." He said, staring straight ahead.  
  
"What happened with Dean?"  
  
Jess shook his head and looked down at his hands.  
  
"He definitely hates me."  
  
"I'm sorry." She said, reaching out to take one of his hands in hers. He moved it away.  
  
"He wants me to stop seeing you."  
  
"What?"  
  
"He doesn't want me to see you anymore. It doesn't mean he and I are automatically friends again… but he'll feel better."  
  
"You told him how insane that is… right?" She frowned.  
  
"Yeah… I tried. He said it was the only way I could even try and fix things."  
  
"Then you don't try."  
  
He looked at her. She couldn't tell if he'd been crying or not, but she could definitely see he was in pain.  
  
"I have to."  
  
"No, you don't!" She said, starting to cry.  
  
He looked away again fighting back tears of his own.  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
"No!" She said defiantly. "You can't do this."  
  
"I don't want to…"  
  
"Then don't. I know you feel bad about everything, but… we'll get past it. Dean will get over it." She insisted.  
  
"Even if I did keep seeing you… I don't know if I'd ever feel right…" He shook his head. "I've done some really crappy things in my life… but this gets first prize."  
  
"Jess, please…"  
  
He turned to face her again. He reached up and wiped her tears away with his thumbs, leaving his hands resting against her cheeks.  
  
She leaned in and kissed him and he returned it. She could feel him crying through the kiss and she started crying again, pulling him closer. They stayed there for a long while, kissing in the rain, both of them were soaked through and through. Neither of them cared.  
  
Jess stood up, she held onto his hand.  
  
"Jess?" She frowned, looking up at him.  
  
"I'll see you around." He said softly, squeezing her hand once and then letting it go.  
  
"Jess!"  
  
He turned away and walked to the end of the bridge. She stood up and called out to him a few more times, but he just kept going.  
  
Rory broke down and looked around her… she wasn't sure what she was searching for. She tried to catch her breath, there was a pain in her chest and she grasped at it. She'd never felt anything like it before. She took a step in the direction he'd gone in and felt like she couldn't go any further. She sank down onto the bridge and cried.  
  


  
A/N: Nope, it's not a heart attack. lol It's something I've personally experienced and if I had to put a name on it, I'd say it's what people mean by 'heart break'. Your chest hurts you can't breathe and you just feel like laying on the ground and crying. Not nice.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	11. Stops, Starts and Surprising Saves

** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!**

Rory rolled over in bed and cringed at the bright sun light. The calm _after_ the storm.  
  
She ran her hand through her hair and tried to think what had happened, how she had gotten home. Most of what happened after Jess left was just a blur.  
  
She sat up in bed and sighed deeply, looking at her reflection in the mirror. She looked a mess.  
  
"Morning." Lorelai said softly as she came out of her bedroom.  
  
"Morning." Rory said, hugging herself.  
  
"How are you feeling?"  
  
"How much do you know?"  
  
"Nothing." Lorelai said honestly.  
  
Rory sat at the kitchen table and covered her face with her hands.  
  
"How did I get home?"  
  
"I came and found you. Jess told me where you were. What happened?" She said, sitting next to Rory and stroking her hair gently.  
  
"We broke up… I think. Some… twisted version of a break up anyway."  
  
"What do you mean." Lorelai frowned.  
  
"Dean asked him to stop seeing me. So he did."  
  
"Just like that?"  
  
"No… I'm simplifying. I'd rather not relive every horrifically painful moment of the conversation."  
  
Lorelai nodded, understanding.  
  
"How was he?" Rory asked.  
  
"Pretty bad shape." Lorelai said, hoping Rory really wanted the truth.  
  
"I just need to talk to him." She nodded. "Things will be different… he'll have changed his mind."  
  
"Rory…" Lorelai sighed, not wanting her daughter to get her hopes up. She never again wanted to see her the way she had been the night before.  
  
"It's ok." Rory insisted, getting up and going into her room.  
  


*****

  
  
Luke looked up as Rory walked into the diner.  
  
"Hey, coffee?" He asked.  
  
"No… is Jess here?" She asked, looking over to the stairs that led up to the apartment.  
  
"Uh… No. He left about an hour ago." Luke sighed.  
  
"When will he be back?"  
  
Luke frowned at her.  
  
"You don't know?" He asked. "He… didn't tell you?"  
  
"Tell me what?" She chuckled nervously.  
  
"He's gone, Rory."  
  
"What?"  
  
"He's gone… he went to Hartford to catch a bus back to New York…"  
  
Rory was already running out of the diner. Luke watched her leave, shocked that she hadn't known.  
  
Tears streamed down her face as she ran down Main Street. She didn't even know where she was going.  
  
She ran straight into Dean.  
  
"Hey…" He looked at her, confused.  
  
Rory shook her head, gasping for breath. He was holding on to her arms and staring at her.  
  
"I have to go." She insisted, trying to get free.  
  
"Calm down."  
  
"You don't understand…" She wept, struggling to get away from him.  
  
"Rory, calm down!" He said more firmly. "What's going on?"  
  
"He's gone!" She shouted at him.  
  
"Who… Gone where?" He frowned.  
  
"Jess. He's gone back to New York." She cried hysterically. "I need to go. I have to stop him."  
  
"How?" Dean asked.  
  
"I don't know. I have to go to the bus station." She looked around and started crying more. "I don't have a car… My mom's got the car... she's in Hartford…"  
  
Dean took a deep breath and looked her in the eyes. He wondered if Jess was hurting as much as she obviously was.  
  
"Come on." He said, pulling her across the street.  
  
They ran towards his house and he disappeared inside. He returned moments later with a set of keys and let them both into his parents car.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	12. Not Ready For Him To Not Be Here

A/N: Thanks for all the great reviews and for reading this far, this is it. The end...

** Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters of Gilmore Girls. If I were that all powerful then Jess would be staying put! So, in summation... Please don't sue me!**

  
  
Dean pulled the car over outside the bus station, ignoring all the 'no parking' signs.  
  
He and Rory got out of the car quickly and ran into the building.  
  
"You can't park there!" Someone shouted.  
  
"I'll be right back!" Dean called back at them.  
  
Rory stood still looking around at all the people and buses lined up. She closed her eyes for a second, trying to stop everything spinning.  
  
"Do you see him?" Dean asked breathlessly, stopping just behind her.  
  
"No." She said, fresh tears coming to her eyes.  
  
"Look…" Dean pointed to a board, which listed all the buses by number and destination.  
  
They hurried over to it and looked for the number of the bus going to New York.  
  
"There are 3 of them." Rory said anxiously, running her hand through her hair.  
  
"I know…" Dean sighed.  
  
"Number 201." She said.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"It's due to leave first." She said, as they started looking for the right bus.  
  
"I don't see it." Dean said, peering past other people and trying to see the numbers in the buses display windows. "Do you think it left early?"  
  
Rory bit her lip and kept looking.  
  
"There are some more buses back there." She said, pointing behind the ticket booth.  
  
"Ok… let's go." Dean nodded.  
  
They found the bus, but Jess wasn't among the people queuing up to get on it.  
  
"We can't have missed him..." She sighed, trying to convince herself.  
  
"You're right." Dean said.  
  
She frowned and looked to where he was pointing. Her heart jumped when she saw Jess sitting on a bench a little way away from them looking at his ticket, his bags on the floor next to him.  
  
"Jess!" She shouted, pushing past people to get to him.  
  
Dean didn't follow this time.  
  
Jess glanced up at the sound of his name and saw her. He stood up.  
  
"Rory… what are you doing here?" He asked sadly.  
  
"You can't go." She said.  
  
"I have to." He said, shaking his head. "I can't be with you, and there's not way I can stay in Stars Hollow and see you everyday…"  
  
She kissed him, wrapping her arms around him. He closed his eyes and put his arms around her, pulling her closer against him.  
  
They stopped kissing but still held each other. He rested his chin on her shoulder and closed his eyes tightly. After the previous night he wasn't feeling emotionally settled and had to fight hard not to cry at just having her in his arms.  
  
He opened his eyes and frowned.  
  
Dean stood watching them with his hands in his pockets. He looked away every now and then. The next time he looked back he met Jess's stare and they locked eyes.  
  
Even from a distance he could see how Jess was feeling. It was plainly etched in his features. What had happened wasn't something he'd forget, but from the pain he could tell Jess was obviously in, they were even.  
  
Dean let a very faint smile form on his lips and he nodded. Jess let out an unsteady sigh of relief at Dean's sign of acceptance.  
  
He closed his eyes again and held Rory even closer.  
  
They eventually let each other go. She picked up one of his bags and he picked up the other, and then they held each other's hands tightly and walked slowly over to Dean.  
  
None of them spoke.  
  
Sorry couldn't fix anything.  
Thank you wasn't enough.  
  
The three of them exchanged brief glances, turned and walked back towards the car.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
